LIFE ENRICHMENT - 2 : PERSONALISED GREETING CARDS

PERSONALISED GREETING CARDS

BY P S SUNDAR

At 82 years, Mrs Pattammal Venugopalan is an invaluable treasure on family fabric.   Married 67 years ago, she has led her family through children's education, several weddings and grooming grandchildren -- she has 5 children, 8 grandchildren and 6 great grandchildren.  All of them, including the sons-in-laws and daughters-in-laws, hail her as a compulsive cook who also excels in household chores. 

But, what singles her out beyond family management is her personalised Greetings and presentation cards..even in this era of digitalisation of sending Greetings through e-mails and SMS, Mrs Pattammal makes her own cards and everyone loves receiving one from her!  These three articles of mine published in The New Indian Express on Oct 10, 2010, Jan 3, 2011, and May 3, 2012 record her contributions.. 

She is busy like a bee...

  

LIFE ENRICHMENT - 1 : POSITIVE APPROACH, KEY TO SUCCESS

POSITIVE APPROACH, KEY TO SUCCESS

BY P S SUNDAR

 Mr N Balachandran, retired Joint Director of Rural Development, has written this to me from Kumbakonam:

"On Nov 8, 2013, I had been to Kumbakonam Head Post Office around 1.30 pm to remit money in a Savings Bank Account.  The counter with a Board indicating continuous working hours between 9 am and 4 pm was vacant. As I was told that the concerned Staff Member had gone for lunch, I waited for more than half an hour patiently.  Thereafter, I approached the Postmaster who was polite.  He searched for the Staff and discovered him engaged in a chat after the lunch.  The Postmaster requested him to resume his work. The response of the Staff member seemed very casual as he took his own time to resume his seat. The treatment meted out by a young Staff member towards his Senior Officer, who is of middle age, and that too in front of the Public, speaks for itself volumes of the deteriorating work culture nowadays, among youngsters.

"I had similar experience in a nationalised bank at Kumbakonam , where the Staff Member was rude.  There also, the Manager apologised for the staff's erratic behaviour. It is high time that there should be training for junior Staff members to effect value-orientation and attitudinal changes".

While Mr Balachandran has titled this as 'Deteriorating work culture',  I am reminded of my following article on 'positive approach' published in The New Indian Express issue dated April 30, 2011, where he also figures. 

  

MY SON'S UNFINISHED AGENDA

MY SON'S UNFINISHED AGENDA 

BY P S SUNDAR

My six articles on my son S Vignesh written on his last six demise anniversaries including this year (Oct 21, 2013) appear in this blog numbered consecutively 1-6. 

In them, I have referred to the articles Vignesh had written. I hereunder give the scan of his three articles published in The Hindu (July 29, 2000) and The New Indian Express (June 26, 2002 and July 10, 2012). 

These are strong articles reflecting his acceptance of the limitations caused by muscular dystrophy and hence deciding to do humanities/commerce course in Plus Two as he could not do Science course despite scoring excellent marks. And, in Commerce stream of Plus One and Two also, he was scoring high marks. He was mentally prepared to become a Chartered Accountant, Cost and Management Accountant and Company Secretary like me and his maternal uncle S Venkatesan so that there would be no need for practicals' classes.  

But, God's intentions were different..Vignesh passed away on Oct 21, 2003, while he was studying in Plus Two....So, his becoming a professional remains an unfinished Agenda. 

NOSTALGIA - 4: RE-DEDICATION TO FOLLOW LINGAN'S GREAT IDEALS

RE-DEDICATION TO FOLLOW LINGAN'S GREAT IDEALS

BY P S SUNDAR

Nov 19 marks the 49th demise anniversary of a notable member of Badaga, the predominant community of the Nilgiris, N Lingan, who had several firsts to his credit. My article on the occasion of his 105th birth anniversary just six days ago (Nov 13) appears in this blog as "Nostalgia - 3: Lingan's contributions recalled with gratitude".

I give here a photo I had taken of the photo of Mr Lingan. 

On the demise anniversary today, I recall the respect I paid to this great citizen of the Nilgiris through my article published in The New Indian Express dated Nov 21, 2011, as given below. 

In this article, I had quoted Lingan's grandson R Muralidharan (Operations Manager, Gateway Hotel Coonoor) to say, "On my part, I have decided to attach special care to senior citizens".   And, I have reasons to confirm that Muralidharan is doing this already.   He is a significant supporter of "Anbalayam", an old age home run by M N Trust at Denalai village, some 10 kilometres from Coonoor. He has been instrumental in the Home getting infrastructural improvements through Rotary Club of Nilgiris including two solar water heating systems costing Rs 54,600 which Rotary Governor Dr Senthilnathan Siva dedicated on Nov 12, 2013. "We have also built separate gender-based toilets in the Home and an approach road.  We have helped in the expansion of the living area resulting in the Home being able to double its accommodation number", Norman Wood, President of Rotary Club of Nilgiris, told me.  

Murali periodically takes his family members, colleagues and friends to the Home resulting in offering of food, plates, blankets and bedspreads besides monetary contributions. 

More importantly, many have told me that because of this, they have learnt the joy of giving.

This reminds me of Bhavadgitha 3.21:

"The deeds of a great man are followed by other people;

 The high standards he sets by exemplary acts, the      world pursues!".

OBITUARY - 3: MEENAMBAL, A LESSON FOR ALL

MEENAMBAL, A LESSON FOR ALL

BY P S SUNDAR

If I ask you to name five Noble laureates, Oscar titleholders or Olympic Gold winners, quite possible that you say, you don't remember them...But, if I ask you to name five persons who had shown extreme affection for you, five who have influenced your life or five with whom you would prefer to spend time, quite possible, you will name them without much of a thinking.  It is not that the celebrity winners are less important to you than the second set, but the people who really touch your lives, who teach life-lessons, who motivate you to success or blossom into your role models need not be well-known pubic figures but can be someone closer to you like mother, father, aunt, cousin or neighbour.

Smt Meenambal was such a great personality that everyone -- not just her son Nathan (Ambi), daughters Raji, Sundari, Bala and Indu all living in Bangalore -- who had occasion to know her would admit to have been influenced by her judicious juxtaposition of espousing social cause with family management.   On the occasion of her passing away at 89 years age on March 2, 2013, this article of mine published in The New Indian Express on Aug 5, 2006, itself is a humble homage.  I also give here the photo I had taken of her on June 6, 2011, at Calicut, the last day I met her as I am reminded of H W Longfellow's immortal lines:

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time.

       

CULTURE - 1: UPHOLDING TRADITION IN MARRIAGES

UPHOLDING TRADITION IN MARRIAGES

BY P S SUNDAR

Among the marriages I attended in the recent times which kept up tradition as I had experienced during my wedding 28 years ago was the one of Hareesh Parthasarathy (Mahindra Sathyam, USA)  with Rekha (Rajalakshmi Sundaram) in Calicut (Kerala, India) on June 6, 2011.   It had an elaborate mix of religious rites with contemporariness that gave the youth all the fun and the much-needed exposure into the tradition attached with marriages.  Another highlight was the colourful illustrative pamphlet prepared by Rekha's younger brother Sriram, an engineering student then, which gave significance of the rites associated with traditional marriage. This is in addition to engaging an event manager.  

This was highlighted in this article of mine in The New Indian Express of June 21, 2011.   Scan images of the pamphlet referred to above are given below.  Two photos I had taken of the groom on uncle's shoulder for garland exchange (maalai mathal) and unjal utsavam are also found here.   

NOSTALGIA - 3: LINGAN'S CONTRIBUTIONS RECALLED WITH GRATITUDE

LINGAN'S CONTRIBUTIONS RECALLED WITH GRATITUDE 

BY P S SUNDAR

Nov 13 , 2013 marked the 105th birth anniversary of a great personality of the Nilgiris, Mr N Lingan, who had several firsts to his credit.  His eldest son Advocate Narayanan passed away on Nov 7, 2013.  His three other sons Dr Sreedharan (practises in Manjur, Nilgiris), Mr Kannan (General Manager, Fernhill Palace Ooty) and Mr Rajaram (Director, Indco factory, Thangadu, Nilgiris) five daughters Messrs Leela, Suseela, Indira, Kasthuri and Bhanumathi recall their father's contributions. 

Mr Lingan's grandson Mr R Muralidharan, Operations Manager, Gateway Hotel Coonoor, responded positively to my suggestion to hold family get-together to express gratitude to the celebrated grand father.

This article of mine published in The New Indian Express issue dated Nov 14, 2011, hails Mr Lingan's great achievements.  

NOSTALGIA - 2: FIELD MARSHAL SAM MANEKSHAW IN PRAGYA'S ALBUM!

FIELD MARSHAL SAM MANEKSHAW IN PRAGYA'S ALBUM!

BY P S SUNDAR

AMONG THE PRIZED POSSESSIONS OF PRAGYA JAIN (NOW IN THE USA) AND NEERAJ JAIN (IN COONOOR) IS THIS ARTICLE OF MINE PUBLISHED IN THE NEW INDIAN EXPRESS, JULY 1, 2008 ...SOON AFTER SAM MANEKSHAW PASSED AWAY AT WELLINGTON (NEAR COONOOR) ON JUNE 27, 2008. 

OBITUARY - 1 THOUSANDS ATTEND LAKSHMI'S FUNERAL

PS SUNDAR'S OBITUARY ON MRS LAKSHMI PUBLISHED IN THE NEW INDIAN EXPRESS ON APRIL 3, 2010.

OBITUARY 2 - GG LEFT A BETTER EARTH THAN THE ONE HE ACQUIRED!

GG LEFT A BETTER EARTH THAN THE ONE HE ACQUIRED!

By P S SUNDAR

                     

                        “Few times last few days, GG was saying ‘Sundar would come and we can have lunch together’.  Somehow, he was thinking that you would join us for lunch” – when Lakshman and his wife Nalini told my wife and me at Jain Kalyana Mandap, Coonoor, during the ‘Surabhi Sanstha’ Jain ladies’ organisation’s charity gala on Sunday, Oct 20, 2013, we rushed to see him taking rest in his car.   We had a jolly-good chat when I invited him for his favourite breakfast with us listing all possible items on the menu.  But, little did we realise that it would be our last meet as three days later, on Oct 23, 2013, he passed away.

                                                            

Mr G Govindarajulu, GG as he was popularly called, was among those few Chairmen who were an embodiment of rich tradition mixed with modern outlook.  He was the longest serving Chairman-cum-Managing Director of The Devashola (N) Tea Estates Co Ltd having led the company for 28 years until he breathed his last at 89 years.

When he acquired Palaniappa and Sultana estates, these properties lacked infrastructural facilities. Because of his foresightedness to improve them, he has left behind a better property than the one he acquired.   Thanks to his broad outlook, today, Sultana and Palaniappa are among the most sought-after jewels in the Western Ghats.   He used to tell me that these were ‘paradise on earth’.

He had been a symbol of experimentation for progressive change.  This is evidenced by his support for eco-friendly approach through zero-cost farming adopting natural agriculture friendly to the flora and fauna of the region and subsequently, the organic cultivation leading to the creation of vermi-compost unit including Panchakavyam.  The cattle shelter unit is a glorious attempt to save cattle condemned for butchery and has enhanced the spiritual value for the properties.

There had been successful efforts in producing zero-processing tea like silver tips through canvas and shade.

During his tenure, Palaniappa Estate became a meteorological station and this made Colacamby a reliable agro-zone of the Nilgiris.  Meteorological data collected from this station are used by tea industry and meteorological officials

The eco-friendly adventure tours he pioneered has led to Palaniappa and Sultana gaining enhanced value for recognition as the apt rendezvous for energy-boosting corporate teamwork training including rope walking, rock climbing, tent-staying, trekking and nature-study.   Nature-linked lifestyle including using food-grade mud pots for cooking and staying in bunkers was a great hit with youth from India and abroad. Throwing open the 650-acre variety plantation and cottages and labour lines to visitors gave opportunity to the uninitiated to learn about such plantations and appreciate Western Ghats as home to rich flora and fauna.   Many have wholeheartedly thanked GG for this. 

GG had regarded his workers and staff as the greatest assets.  This year, his manpower was happy to receive his blessings when he disbursed the bonus.   The renovation of the temple and conduct of Kumbabishekam there were highly appreciated by his workforce.

He was also Chairman of The Nilgiri Agro Agencies (P) Ltd and Director of The Mysore Fertilisers Co (P) Ltd and Self Savings Scheme (Chit Funds) Pvt Ltd.

On the social front, he had been a member of Rotary Club of Nilgiris in the beginning and later for several decades, a highly respected member of the Lions Club of The Nilgiris of which he was the oldest Past President.

As a strong supporter of cultural activities, GG was a prominent front-row personality at most of the 138 programmes the Nilgiris Cultural Association (NCA) had organised in the last 15 years of its service to the cause of cultural promotion. .  He played major role to promote Tamil culture through lyricist and cine song-writer Vairamuthu.  He was physically lifted sitting on his wheel chair to the auditorium of St Joseph’s Boys’ Anglo Indian Higher Secondary School, Coonoor, On Sept 28, 2013, to attend the ‘Life Redefined’ programme of dances on wheelchair organised by NCA. That was the last NCA programme he enjoyed.

“As founder Trustee of Nilgiri Sri Sai Trust, GG had contributed significantly to the construction of Sai Kailash Mandir in Yellanahalli.  We will name after him the new staying facility for devotees”, Nilgiri Sai Organisations’ President Dr Ramu told me.   The organisation staged bhajans in his honour.

Little wonder, therefore, that thousands of people from different walks of life attended the funeral of this renowned industrialist and philanthropist and offered their heartfelt condolences to his sons M Lakshman (wife Nalini), M Balaji Rao (Sharmila), grandsons Ashwin (Aishwarya) and Rohit and granddaughter Seetha (who lives in Hongkong with her husband K Sambasiva Rao and son Siddhartha and daughter Sadhana).  GG’s wife Lakshmi had passed away on April 1, 2010.

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NOSTALGIA- 1: VCR, OUR FAMILY ENTERTAINER

VCR, OUR FAMILY ENTERTAINER

P S Sundar

  

ON my way back from my lecture-tour in Australia, Malaysia, Thailand and Singapore, I bought a Video Cassette Recorder (VCR) in Singapore. That was some 25 years ago when only imported recorders and players (VCP) were available in India. Only a few households possessed them. My family wanted me to be smart enough to pick up an original VCR from Singapore and they were happy that I acted accordingly.

When I took this prized possession to my home in Coonoor, there was a different problem — we did not have a television.

For that matter, only a privileged few had a TV in which they managed to see Sri Lanka’s Rupavahini. Doordarshan was out of reach in Nilgiris. Some proud possessors told me that they had subsequently bought a VCP and used the TV more as a monitor for their VCP than to receive telecasts. In my case, it was the reverse — the VCR had come home before the TV. At a family meeting over dining table we decided to buy a TV. I went to Coimbatore and bought a TV that had a ‘Picture-in-Picture’ feature and was promoted as the ‘future’ of TVs.

VHS cassettes, which could be read in the VCR, could be hired from local rental store for Rs 10 for 24 hours. Choice for the movie of the night was aplenty amongst the family that we ended up, on certain nights, hiring two cassettes. Occasionally we were forced to see the same movie again. Many cassettes had poor recording. There was no way to stop our neighbours from having their bout of entertainment as they also occasionally brought their own favourite movie.

As some friends said that they could occasionally get Doordarshan telecast from Kodaikkanal, we decided to give it a try. Installing the antenna was a Herculean task. It was a 21-element huge antenna erected over two pipelengths scaling a height of 40 feet. Huge stay-wires on different sides protected the antenna from falling.

After several rotations, including that by technicians atop the house, we succeeded in capturing signals that came as colour grains. If capturing the signals were a Herculean task, maintaining the same angle was tougher, thanks to strong winds and monkeys. Almost every evening, one person would be on top of the house, another at the bottom of the pole and the rest in front of the TV — all involved in the task of gaining signals in the air sent freely by the Government of India. And no matter how grainy it was, it was a needed pastime.

I still remember, it would have been one of the earliest cricket matches to be shown on television in India. There was a big debate among the spectators in my house. After every ball was hit, the challenge was to find the ball within the 21- inch of grain-filled telecast. The big antenna had its benefits that none of us thought initially. The mast-like antenna was used as a landmark in the locality.

It was the talk of the town. Our maidservant took pride in working in our house that looked like a kappal (ship).

Subsequently, low power transmitters were erected in Nilgiris followed by high power ones. We shifted to a three element antenna. A neighbour could get signals just with his coat hanger. Once cable came, antenna became redundant.

Now, of course, DTH has arrived. The elders in the family who enjoyed the VCR are no more. Those surviving play the VCR no more. However, I periodically clean it reminiscing the ‘status’ and the unmatched entertainment it gave to us those days.

(PUBLISHED IN THE NEW INDIAN EXPRESS MARCH 24, 2009)

P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- FIFTH ANNIVERSARY

“TIME-OUT”:

WE LIVE IN OUR SON’S MEMORY.

BY P.S. SUNDAR

Today (Oct 21) is the fifth death anniversary of our only son, Vignesh.  He was 15 years old studying in Plus Two when he breathed his last.  Just 15 months before that The New Indian Express had carried his article saying that despite scoring top rank in Matriculation exam, he had chosen Commerce group in Plus Two for two reasons: One, he was physically disabled and hence could not attend laboratory classes which meant, he could not pursue engineering or medicine courses; two, he did not believe that students who scored top marks in Tenth class should go only to science and maths groups as excellent chartered accountants, cost accountants and company secretaries came from commerce stream.  His article expressed his desire to become such a professional.  But he passed away mid-way.

Vignesh was growing up like other children in Coonoor until we noticed while in class four, he faced problems for walking fast, running or jumping. Our friend, Dr K. S. Pothi, diagnosed it as a rare disorder called muscular dystrophy.   “There is no cure for this growing disorder.  It wastes the muscles, makes the patient immobile, cripples him to wheel chair and chokes breathing to death.  The end may come soon”, he warned us.

Shocked we were, but from then onwards, it was an unending trial of looking for light in the dark tunnel.   Acupuncture, acupressure, homeopathy, ayurveda, physiotherapy, callipers – the poor child underwent all tortures in the name of treatment.   One evening, Vignesh fell down while standing and suffered a fracture, but never ever did he walk thereafter.  We came across Dr K Gunasekaran of GK Siddha Hospital in Perambur, Chennai, who instantly became our friend and comforted him through ozhichal, pizhichal, othadam, oil massage etc.   My wife shifted to Chennai with Vignesh where he studied for eight years and I kept shuttling.   

Despite doctor’s advice, we decided not to go for second child to give undivided attention to Vignesh.  After all, he was not a rotten brinjal to be thrown away and fresh one bought for replacement.   Every working day, even when Vignesh was in Plus Two, Shyamala took him to school, attended to his toilet requirements, fed him and brought him back in the evening.  She bathed him.   She helped him to move pages, open books and work on his computer in which, he was excellent.  She could never be away from him. 

We gave him paraphernalia comforts like air conditioning, computer and television.  He floated his own website. He helped his classmates for their studies and had a wide circle of friends.  His school’s Vice Principal dedicated to Vignesh a book he had authored.  We believe Vignesh enjoyed his short life with us.   My wife and I learnt from him the nuances of caring for the disabled, the benefits of being patient, the meaning of life lying between birth and death and the importance of organ donation and helping others.

My wife and I wound up our Chennai establishment after his demise and are living ‘together – still alone’ in Coonoor practising whatever we learnt from him. Truly, the child is the father of man! 

(PUBLISHED IN THE NEW INDIAN EXPRESS DT OCT 22, 2005)  

P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- 1

P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- 2

DIWALI: FROM GALA CELEBRATION TO SOLEMN CEREMONY 

BY P.S. SUNDAR 

Diwali has cycled a full circle in my life – from gala celebration with family and friends to solemn ceremony praying for my only child’s soul to rest in peace. 

 When I was a child, Diwali was almost a month-long festivity at home. Preparations would begin a month ahead with my parents drafting list of sweets and savouries to be made specifying weight/number along with anticipated expenses. Dishes were to be shared with 50 homes. No reputed sweet shop was in Coonoor that time; in any case, my parents wanted to prepare the dishes at home under their watchful eyes. 

My father would commission Krishnan Nambudri, the Asthana cook for our family celebrations, and the parents would discuss their dishes. Nambudri was comfortable with making Badhusha, but failed to produce shapely jilabi. Boondhi was easy and laddu was rolled out of it. Mixture’s richness depended on the ingredients used, but my parents were against using artificial colours. 

Once menu was finalised, my father would arrange for necessary materials to be bought. A week before Diwali, Nambudri would land with two coolies carrying his equipments. My parents used to regard this as the advantage – Nambudri was a freelancing cook armed with necessary equipments! Dishes would be ready couple of days before Diwali. 

Likewise, a month ahead, my father used to take my brothers and myself to cloth shop, buy materials for trousers and shirts, take us to our Asthana tailor Muthu for recording measurements. My father firmly believed that an excellent tailor like Muthu must be supported with stitching orders. The dress would be ready a week before Diwali. It was a pleasure distributing sweets to friends and bursting crackers donning new dress. 

As years rolled by, my brothers moved to different places on job commitments, my parents passed away and even my wife had to shift to Chennai with our son Vignesh as he contracted the incurable muscular dystrophy crippling him to wheelchair. I was shuttling between Coonoor, foreign destinations and Chennai and my childhood Diwali gaiety vanished for ever. 

Vignesh was excellent in studies and had floated his own website while in ninth class, but was dependent on others. We had employed six persons to assist my wife for Vignesh’s Siddha oil massage, physiotherapy, toilet attendance, driving him to school, hospital and back. Vignesh enjoyed giving them dresses and sweets for Diwali. (“There is more joy in giving than receiving”, he once wrote in an article). He did this in October 2003 also when he was studying in Plus One clueless that it was the last year he could do so – yes, two days before Diwali, he breathed his last. That year, no house in our campus celebrated Diwali. My wife and I silently prayed for his soul to rest in peace. We returned to Coonoor soon thereafter. Every Diwali thereafter is a solemn occasion making us remember Vignesh and praying for his soul to rest in peace. As we observe sixth anniversary of Vignesh’s demise this October 21, I realise, I don’t miss so much of my childhood Diwali gaiety as I miss my child.

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P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- 3

WHEELCHAIR KEEPS US VIGNESH’S MEMORY 

 BY P.S. SUNDAR 

 “SIR, the chair is ready in the shop. We can place order for shipment”, my contact person in Japan told me over phone.

 “Thanks, but we won’t need it any more”, I replied. 

 “But why, Sir? Have you bought a better model? Till a fortnight ago, you were saying this was the best model”. 

 “But, now, the user is no more. He passed away a week ago. So, we are donating his present chair itself to the hospital”. 

 This was a wheel chair – modern, motorised and usable on road and indoors. It could tilt, stretch and climb slopes and steps. With cushioned seats and hand rests, it could provide comfort. I had spotted the model of the chair, then a rarity, in a specialised outlet in Japan and wanted to create a workstation for my only son, Vignesh, then 15 years old and studying for Plus Two, but was crippled to wheel chair by the incurable muscular disorder. As the physical availability of the chair would need over 10 days’ time, I had requested my contact there to follow up, but when the message of the chair being ready came, Vignesh had already left us for ever. 

We donated one of his wheel chairs to the hospital in Perambur treating him during his ill-fated eight long years, but have brought to our home in Coonoor another chair he was using which keep us in memory of him as we enter the seventh year of his demise on Oct 21. 

 We cannot separate ourselves from this chair more so when we read the record of Dhuruvan, Vice Principal of his school in his book, “Dhurvan Kattum Siruvar paathai” (The path shown to children by Dhuruvan) about the way my wife used to wheel Vignesh to school daily. “I had never taught Vignesh, but was deeply moved by the commitment he showed in fulfilling the desire of his parents to excel in studies and co-curricular activities. So, I am dedicating this book to his memory”, Dhuruvan wrote to us sending a copy of the same. On page 3 of the book, his dedication in the form of a poem along with Vignesh’s photo appears. As it is uncommon for authors to dedicate their books of hard work to unknown persons, the contribution the wheel chair has made to Vignesh getting recognition within the limited moving space making Dhuruvan dedicate his book to Vignesh’s memory endears us closer to his wheel chair.

Vignesh did not see much of even Chennai but whatever little he saw during the 15 short years he lived with us was because of his wheel chair. For the shopkeepers and even the beggars in Ragava Street, Vignesh’s wheel chair was a familiar vehicle every morning and evening to and fro his school. Equally so, to the occupants on Paper Mills Road on his trip to and fro hospital every evening.

I heard of neighbours telling us a few days after our moving lock, stock barrel to Coonoor that they are missing Vignesh and his wheel chair. We are missing Vignesh but not his wheel chair.

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P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- 4

WHEN MEDICINE IS YET TO PROVIDE AN ANSWER 

BY P.S. SUNDAR. 

Around this time last year, Dr Pier Lorenzo Puri of Sanford Burnham Medical Research Institute, USA, pleased lakhs of patients suffering from the incurable muscular dystrophy (MD) with the message that his team has come out with a finding bearing potential treatment for MD.

MD patients suffer from debilitating muscle wastage and many die in teenage. Dr Puri’s research figured out technical ways to keep the muscle stem pool fresh and ready to regenerate the wasting muscle. Dr Puri was quoted to say, “Our mission is to improve the lives of patients and extend their lives until they can benefit from a cure 20 years from now”. Ever since then, Sanford’s blog, Beaker, has been posting of responses from patients and parents anxiously enquiring when they can get the benefit. Dr Puri, who is credited to have worked with many MD patients, is very understanding and caring when he says, “There is an emotional charge in my lab. We know there are many children waiting for us to do our job and when we work, we are targeting those faces, those smiles”. 

Substantial number of enquiries in the blog has come from Indians. Due to bureaucratic indifference, there is no official statistics relating to MD patients in India. So much so, some quarters are urging Government to identify and include MD patients in the country’s census – vital information required to create a better living ambience for these terminally-ill patients. Of late, some organisations are creating awareness and providing possible guidance to MD patients. Only this year, Government has included MD in the draft of the new law on disability. 

Until eight years ago, I was also anxiously searching for information to save my only son 
Vignesh who was suffering from MD. As he was confined to wheelchair and my wife, Shyamala, was taking care of his requirements, I was doing the running in many countries looking for some light in the tunnel. That was when I came across a US experimental study claiming to repair wasting muscles with a shot of powerful injection whose landed cost in India would be prohibitively expensive. Shyamala and I even volunteered to offer Vignesh for experiment-testing but even before mentionable progress could be made, MD snatched him away from us three days before Diwali – on Oct 21, 2003. He was 15 years young studying in XII class (Plus Two). We have no news about advanced research to this injection. 

When doctors diagnosed nine-year-young Vignesh as suffering from MD, they said that it was a rare disorder although there were many types. I could also see only one case but the parents gave up. Shyamala and I decided not to have another child as Vignesh was not a rotten brinjal to be replaced but to shower undivided attention to help him contribute significantly during his short life with us. Now, we are orphaned as MD has consumed him but we feel satisfied to have done our best. And, MD has taught us a new meaning for life of converting disabled into differently-abled when medicine is yet to provide an answer. 

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P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON -- 5

THE JOY OF GIVING 

BY P.S. SUNDAR. 

Among the lessons my wife Shyamala and I learnt from our only son Vignesh who succumbed to muscular dystrophy in 2003 was the joy imbedded in giving. And, to coincide with his ninth death anniversary on Oct 21, we are experiencing the joy of donating our bodies for medical research and possible organs’ transplantation when we die. 

 Vignesh had just completed 15 years and was in Plus Two when he breathed his last. He was confined to wheelchair with absolutely no physical activity worth the name but was gifted with excellent mental faculty. He was a topper in exams and many competitions including elocution, essay writing, Mathematics and project preparation. At a time when computer had not become popular with children, he had already floated his own website. Even the night before he passed away, he had updated his website. When we discovered it after his demise, we derived satisfaction that we were fortunate to give him a feeling of living until his last moment for, a person who was threatened with death a few moments later would not care to update his website! 

 In the 15 short years he lived with us, we noticed Vignesh using all his limited strengths to help others. During the Matriculation public exam and the Plus One common exam, mothers of his classmates used to drag their wards to our home for Vignesh to help them succeed in the exams. And, he had the knack of throwing up successful practical tips to those who had not been used to studying all through the year! There had been many instances of ‘instant successes because of his guidance! 

 And, he was the first and last resort for his classmates to depend on when they had to complete assignments. He was always ready to help them with smile so much so his Vice Principal R Swaminathan described him, ‘a rare soul who vanished into the galaxy when others were wanting him much’. The Vice Principal dedicated his book to the memory of Vignesh and wrote that because of this, he derived greater satisfaction in writing this book than when he wrote his three previous books. “I had not taught Vignesh any lesson but learnt from him the art of helping with smile”, he wrote to us. 

Every Deepavali and Pongal, Vignesh took enormous pleasure in gifting new sets of dress to the nearly six persons who worked for us to help him in ozhichal and pizhichal Siddha treatment, driving to school and toiletry. Equally so to the needy with dress and sweets. The impact was so powerful that in the year he passed away, none in the seven other houses in the campus we lived celebrated Deepavali! 

 On his demise, we donated his wheel chair, exercise cycle and other equipments to the hospital which treated him for seven years. Subsequently, we donated the eyes of all elders in the family on their demise. We donated blood on possible occasions and now, we are donating ourselves sharing Vignesh’s joy of giving – when shared, grievance halves but joy doubles and the joy of giving multiplies! 

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P S SUNDAR'S ARTICLE ON HIS SON - 6

WHEEL CHAIR, A SYMBOL OF ABILITY, NOT DISABILITY! 

 BY P.S SUNDAR 

  “Next time you see a wheelchair, call it a symbol of ability, not disability”, said Syed Salluddin Pasha, founder of Ability Unlimited Foundation (AUF), New Delhi, after presenting spellbinding dances by his differently-abled disciples at ‘Life Redefined’ programme conducted by Nilgiris Cultural Association in Coonoor three weeks ago.

He was right because for these performers, wheelchair was their leg; more importantly, it was the equipment giving them confidence and credit resulting in their institution gaining entry in Guinness Book of World Records for presenting over 10,000 performances of more than 100 dance-theatre productions. 

 And, the performance was incredible, given the reality that they spun the wheels 150 kilometres per hour, adventurously drove all over the stage with high speed exerting unbelievable brake-control to stage breathtaking acrobatic dance forms. They even glorified wheelchair as decorated ‘ratham’ for Kurushektra episode. 

 “We do several hours of practice to be adept on wheelchair”, Pasha told me. “Most certainly, I understand the limitations”, I told him without disclosing the reality that my wife and I know what life on wheelchair is, given the fact that our only son Vignesh was on wheelchair for eight years until he breathed his last as Twelfth class student on Oct 21, 2003. 

 As Vignesh was suffering from the incurable muscular dystrophy which was weakening his muscles gradually but steadily, there was no way he could use his hands to drive the wheelchair. We had kept an attendant to drive him to school and hospital daily at Perambur in Chennai. AUF students’ mastery over wheelchair is by those whose hands are strong.

 Wheelchair was undoubtedly the mode of mobility for Vignesh without which he would not have achieved his academic excellence and so, it was his symbol of ability. We even attempted to create a living-station with hygienic toilet attachment. By removing a metal sheet on the seat, an emergency commode could be fixed, but we never used it.

 I had arranged for a modern, motorised wheelchair from Japan but before it could reach, Vignesh passed away. An anecdote has it that a small boy pelted a stone on a speeding Jaguar car in the USA causing a dent and when the owner stopped and shouted at him, the boy replied, “Sorry, but I didn’t know to drag attention to people when everyone is speeding...my brother has fallen off the wheelchair and I can’t lift him..Kindly help”. The man put the brother on wheelchair, nurtured his bruises and apologised to the small boy for being rude.. but did not repair the dent to remind himself, “I should not speed through the life so that someone has to throw a stone at me to show the ground reality”!

I recall the day when Vignesh fell off from his wheelchair while I tried to negotiate through a short slope. I should have driven the wheel chair in reverse tilting it upstairs. If he falls, besides causing any possible injury to him, we would need help to lift and place him back on wheelchair.

 We have donated his wheelchairs but retain one as his memory – a symbol of his ability! 

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