NOSTALGIA 8: MOTHER THERESA OF MY FAMILY

NOSTALGIA 8: 

MOTHER THERESA OF MY FAMILY

BY P.S. SUNDAR

March 16, 2014

I write this on June 20, 2008 – the 23^rd anniversary day of my wedding with Shyamala.  Soon after getting up at 5 am, I prostrated gratefully in front of the photos of my late parents and her late parents who had the foresight to arrange the alliance resulting in Shyamala becoming the most precious gift of my life. Events flashed back as I remembered my describing Shyamala as ‘Mother Theresa of my family’.

In October 1987, we were blessed with a son whom we named Vignesh.   He grew up like other children until he started going to school in Coonoor when we discovered that he had problems of walking fast, running or jumping.  Our friend, Dr K. S. Pothi, diagnosed that Vignesh was suffering from that rare disorder called muscular dystrophy.   “There is no cure for this growing disorder.  It wastes the muscles, makes the patient immobile, cripples him to wheel chair and chokes the breathing system to death.  The end can come any time”, he said.

Shocked we were, but from then onwards, it was an unending trial of looking for light in the long tunnel.   Acupuncture, acupressure, homeopathy, ayurveda, physiotherapy, callipers – the poor child underwent all tortures in the name of treatment.   One evening while Vignesh was in fourth standard, he fell incurring a fracture, but never ever did he walk thereafter.  We came across Dr K Gunasekaran of GK Siddha Hospital in Perambur, Chennai, who instantly became our friend and helped a lot for treating Vignesh through ozhichal, pizhichal, othadam, oil massage etc.   Shyamala shifted to Chennai with Vignesh where he studied for eight years and I kept shuttling.   

We decided not to go for second child to give undivided attention to Vignesh.  He should not be treated as a rotten brinjal to be thrown away and fresh one bought for replacement.   Every working day, even when Vignesh was in Plus Two, Shyamala took him to school, attended to his toilet requirements, fed him and brought him back in the evening.  She bathed him.   She helped him to move pages, open books and on his computer in which, he was excellent.  Although there were servants, Shyamala had to physically lift him a few times each day.  She could never be away from him.  She did all this without a wrinkle on her face so, Vignesh should not  feel that he was a burden to us.

Shyamala received compliments when Vignesh bagged rank in Matriculation public exam.   But, on October 21, 2003, Vignesh, Plus-Two student, breathed his last.   His school Headmistress told me, “We used to pray that at least for all the trouble your wife took, Vignesh should be all right”.  That’s when I replied, “If there is someone whom I can describe as Mother Theresa in my family, it is she, it is she and none but she!”.

We wound up our Chennai establishment immediately and in the five three years, are living ‘together – still alone’ in Coonoor with both our parents and our only son dead.   Now, Shyamala is giving a new meaning to my life with her affection.  Today’s anniversary was in this backdrop.